Tips for Managing Conflict

While managing conflict can be challenging, it’s an inevitable part of life. Large-scale and destructive geopolitical conflict aside, disagreements can be a healthy way to grow and build relationships if you develop the appropriate conflict management skills. These skills are helpful in any environment, but we’ll focus on handling disagreements better in the workplace, as this advice is also relevant to other relationships and settings. 

In this post, we’ll share some insights from author Amy Gallo, who has done extensive research into conflict in the workplace. She discusses novel approaches in a podcast interview titled “How to Manage: Conflict” on the Women at Work podcast. These insights include understanding the different approaches to and types of conflict and tips for managers on thinking differently about approaching conflict in the workplace.

We’ve summarised the conversation to highlight the key takeaways from the podcast interview and will share some ideas on developing conflict management skills at the end of the post.

Types of conflict

According to Gallo, there are four different types of workplace conflict. These include the following:

1. Task conflict: A task conflict involves confusion or disagreement about the goal of the task or confusion around deadlines. 
2. Status conflict: Status conflict involves disagreements about who is in charge and who has authority in the given situation.
3. Process conflict: Process conflict occurs when there is disagreement around how to do things and how specific processes should be carried out, for example, how you’re going to tackle the completion of a project.
4. Relationship conflict: This is where conflict becomes personal and a battle between two or more people to get their needs met.

Approaches to conflict

Gallo shares that there is no “right” way to approach conflict, as it depends on the situation and what we must do to achieve the best possible long-term outcome. However, understanding how different people might approach conflict can help us to learn more effective ways to deal with disagreements.

The four different approaches to handling conflict include:

1. Ignoring the conflict: This approach includes avoiding the conflict altogether, which isn’t necessarily “wrong.” However, it can prevent you from having what initially feels like uncomfortable conversations, which might actually help build constructive working relationships in the long term.
2. Addressing the conflict directly: A direct approach involves tackling the disagreement head-on by sitting down and hashing it out. 
3. Addressing the conflict indirectly: Stories, metaphors, and a mediator can also help dilute the intensity of a full-on confrontation.
4. Ending the relationship: The last and final resort is to end a relationship and not bother to try and resolve the issue. Ghosting and ignoring people is not an ideal solution, but it can be appropriate in certain situations, for example, if there is any kind of violence or abuse involved. 

Tips for managing conflict in the workplace

We’ve covered some of the broader approaches to developing conflict management skills and shared some insights into the different types of conflict. Now, we’ll share some more tips from the podcast interview that can help contextualise them. 

Be aware of the spectrum between conflict seeking and avoiding

Gallo talks about how everyone falls on a spectrum between conflict-seeking and conflict-avoiding. Some people seek out conflict, while others avoid it at all costs. However, while some people seem to be one or the other, there are nuances, as each situation you encounter might require a different approach. Through practice, you can also learn to adopt a different strategy, which may be more appropriate to the given situation.

Be curious

We all have a default way of approaching a tense situation, which can differ depending on who you disagree with and the intensity of the debate. However, being curious about why the disagreement is happening in the first place can help you approach it differently. 

Instead of coming to the conversation with assumptions about why it is happening, being curious can open you up to a collaborative discussion. Being generally curious can also help to take the pressure off a tense conversation and help you feel less guarded and defensive. 

Know what hat you are wearing

It’s easy to build close personal friendships in the workplace. However, as a manager, you must be clear about your role when navigating conflict with colleagues you have become friends with. Being clear about how you are approaching the conversation can help avoid escalating any task or process conflict into a relationship conflict. 

Prioritise respect over likability

One of the main tips shared in the podcast interview was prioritising respect over likability. Confronting people in the workplace can be challenging, but by prioritising respect, you can ensure that conflict is resolved and doesn’t escalate.

Some more tips for prioritising respect instead of likability include:

1. Be equitable and fair. By treating everyone’s concerns equally and focusing on fairness, you can avoid playing favourites and potentially creating more conflict.
2. Be clear about your intention. Approaching a difficult conversation with a clear purpose will make it easier to make it more goal-oriented and less personal. 
3. Resolve conflict at the lowest level: Resolving conflict as soon as possible without involving higher management is essential to prevent unnecessary escalation and gossip.
4. Be transparent: It’s challenging enough to manage conflict between one other person, but when you are navigating conflict that involves multiple relationships, it’s essential to be transparent. For example, when giving instructions from your superior to your colleagues that you don’t agree with, you can be transparent with your superior about wanting to understand them. You can then respectfully relay the instructions to your colleagues without feeling like you have to fight them.

Conflict is normal

We’ve shared many tips above, but one of the key takeaways from the interview is that a certain level of conflict is normal. By accepting that conflict will happen, we can take the pressure off ourselves to do everything “right”. Instead, we can focus on upskilling and developing effective ways of approaching and managing conflict. 

Learn conflict management skills at SACAP Global

At SACAP Global, we offer a range of short online courses to help you learn practical conflict management skills, most notably Dynamics of Interpersonal Communication: Relationships and Conflict Management. 

This course will empower you to manage conflict more effectively and apply various approaches to interpersonal dynamics in the workplace, family, and social settings. You’ll also gain more profound insight into interpersonal conflict dynamics and emotion’s role and function in interpersonal relationships.

To further your knowledge in this area, we offer courses to help you develop valuable communication skills and better understand human behaviour. These include the following:

• Social Influences on Human Behaviour: Learn more about how social influence impacts individual feelings, thinking and behaviour and how these play out in group dynamics.
• Intro to Human Behaviour: Improve your self-awareness to help you better relate to yourself and others. Learn more about how your behaviour impacts your personal and professional connection with others. 
• Factors Influencing Human Behaviour: Explore what elements shape your social attitudes and behaviours and how these impact how you connect with others and achieve your goals. 
• Effective Interpersonal Communication: Learn about the foundations of effective interpersonal communication, including how communication works and how to strengthen your personal and professional connections. 

For more information, browse our course list.